If I don't write it down in my date book it isn't real. But May 17th will come whether it's recorded or not, and at 7:30 AM on that day I will have spinal surgery to remove a ruptured disc that is pinching a nerve. (Revision: two discs were found to be utterly destroyed by the bicycle accident.) Since March 27th my left arm and hand have been paralyzed. I spent a week on Vicodin and muscle relaxers, followed by oral steroid therapy. I didn't talk about it here because I feel weak and pathetic. But relief (or death, or complete paralysis if the knife does something wrong) is on it's way. After begging my so-called doctor all that time to please do something for me it's going to be taken care of finally. And no thanks to him either. Aside from being really concerned that something will go wrong I'm looking forward to resuming my life, pain free.
Oh, I almost forgot- besides all the metal pins and plates and junk that's going into my neck I'm getting a new disc made from cadaver bone. Someone, somewhere, was kind enough to give this gift before going on to the next life. That's beautiful, don't you think? I'm going to be mindful of this little piece of bone and what it means always.
10:23 a.m. - 2006-04-27
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